Have you ever asked yourself these or similar questions?

• Can I afford to buy that new and bigger House / Car / SMART TV?
• Can I afford to eat that luscious looking chocolate cake?
• Can we afford to not save for our retirement?
• Can I afford to skip class or that grueling workout my trainer assigned?
• Can I afford to spend time on social media?
• Can I afford to worry about what other people think?

The more we think we want something (or perhaps don’t want something), the more we’ll work to justify a yes. And, often, the more time spent defending probably means the answer is a no.

How do you usually warrant a yes or no answer to the afford question? Do you look at your checking account balance or weigh yourself on a scale? Or do you procrastinate or line up excuses?

Please allow me to suggest, that instead of pondering just those things, you turn to your core or personal values as well.

Much like the business world uses company core values to guide their employees and business decisions, you can use your core values to guide your daily, monthly, and long-term decisions as well.

Personal Values

What do I stand for? What am I striving for? Why is that important to me? Answering questions such as these will help you define your core values.

Fleshing out the answer to these matters may prove challenging but will be worth the effort to build a foundation of sound beliefs and commitments. Which, in turn, will help direct you in the numerous decisions you’ll face on your journey through life.

“…your personal core values are there to guide behavior and choice. Get them right and you’ll be swift and focused in your decision-making, with clear direction. Get them wrong or leave them ambiguous, and you’ll constantly wonder how you got into this mess. – Kevin Daum

There is no magic number of personal values one should hold. Pick too few though and you won’t have much of a guide. Selecting too many, however, may leave you still unable to make solid decisions. You may identify with many personal values, but I suggest identifying 5 – 8 as your most significant.

Just as there is no magic number of values, there is also no magic formula for determining your values. It helps not to analyze and over think this, but to go with your gut instead.

Whatever you do, be honest with yourself and choose values that truly mean something to you. Please don’t choose a value because you think it’s one another person would want you to have.

Identifying Personal Values

There are many lists of core values on the Internet – here is a brief list from James Clear. Take some time to review this list or another from a Google search and jot down those that speak to you.

Use these questions for inspiration:

• What do I stand for or believe in?
• What talents or skills do I contribute to the world?
• When do I feel the most satisfied or happy?
• What am I aiming or striving for?
• Why is that important to me?

If you struggle to determine your personal values, think of someone you admire. Then decide what the things you admire about them are and why. This should help you identify core values important to you.

(In an article for Inc.com, Kevin Daum, provides his 5-step process here.)

Ranking Personal Values

Once you’ve identified your primary values, strive to rank them in order of importance. The order will help you when making decisions that involve one or more values, or when choosing between multiple goals, wants, or needs.

Pictured below is handy chart you can use to rank your values now. It can also be used to assist in deciding between multiple options, goals, or projects, which we’ll discuss below. Click here for a PDF version.

List the personal values you identified earlier in the boxes on the chart. Then evaluate each value against the others circling or highlighting the corresponding number for the value most important to you between the two core values.

After ranking each against all the others, count the number of circles/highlights chosen for each core value and next list the total count in the corresponding count box in the far right column. See example below.

As depicted in the chart the values rank in the following order of importance in this random example:

1. Knowledge (purple/no. 4 in the chart with a total count of 5)
2. Health (orange/no. 1 in the chart with a total count of 4)
3. Authenticity (blue/no. 2 in the chart with a total count of 3)
4. Compassion (green/no. 3 in the chart with a total count of 2)
5. Security (pink/no. 6 in the chart with a total count of 1)
6. Loyalty (teal/no. 5 in the chart with a total count of 0)

Spend some time choosing and ranking your values, but remember not over to think it!

Evaluation and Alignment

Let’s now take a look at the values in action as they pertain to the questions posed earlier.

Using health, authenticity, compassion, knowledge, loyalty, and security, as chosen personal values, how do the hypothetical questions above come out?

1. Can I afford to buy that new and bigger SMART TV?
   • Justification Thoughts: I’ve been working hard, my cat just died, and my girlfriend just broke up with me, I deserve to show myself a little compassion and reward. I’ll increase my knowledge and health having a new TV with all the educational and how-to shows I can watch. Video game playing on a badass TV will help me de-stress.
   • Values Consideration: My health will decrease with the more sitting & watching I’ll do. I’ve watched 100 episodes of Chopped and Bobby Flay on The Food Network, and I still don’t cook. Spending the $$ will cause me to feel less secure as I’ll have to dip into my savings to buy it. I just told Jay he shouldn’t buy new skis and save his money instead, me buying a new TV now isn’t being very authentic.
2. Can I afford to eat that luscious looking chocolate cake?
   • Justification: I haven’t eaten much today. I’ll workout longer tomorrow. I’m craving something sweet. Everyone else is having a piece.
   • Reality: I might enjoy the taste for a bit, then my blood sugar will crash, and I’ll be tired and get a headache. I made a commitment to myself to improve my diet and health, eating that cake won’t be exhibiting loyalty to myself (and if I can’t be loyal to myself…). Didn’t I just tell Marci I gave up sweets? Ah, that authenticity thing again. I know from experience that the best way to conquer cravings is to not give into them because the feeling will pass.

Do you see how you might use your personal values to evaluate choices and make better decisions? Try it with one of the other hypothetical questions posed earlier, or try one of your own you might be struggling with.

• • • Can we afford to not save for our retirement?
    • Can I afford to skip class or that grueling workout my trainer assigned?
    • Can I afford to spend time on social media?
    • Can I afford to worry about what other people think?

Aligning with your values helps keep you honest with yourself and pointed in the right direction. You may find it useful to revisit this exercise every year or so as your core values may change.

You can afford anything, but not everything — and that’s true not only for your money, but also your time, focus, energy and attention. ~ Paula Pant

Comparison and Decision

Often we must make a decision on multiple things at once or choose one item to focus on amongst a list of goals or projects. Utilize the chart we used above to rank your values again now to compare different options with your personal values in mind – here is the link again.

This time list 6-8 items from your major to do list in the boxes. Alternatively, you could list the various business ideas you’ve been pondering or try comparing eight items from your bucket list.

Again, rank each item against all the others, with your core values in mind. Count how many circles/highlights are identified for the corresponding items. The item with the highest number of circles will suggest what you focus on first. A hypothetical example depicted below.

This case suggests ranking these goals in the following order:

1. Lose 25 pounds
2. Travel to Hawaii for 20th Wedding Anniversary (tied with #3)
3. Max out Roth IRA
4. Change jobs
5. Learn to build a website (tied with #6)
6. Write a book
7. Run a 1/2 marathon

As you can see the chart isn’t perfect and you may have some ties. To break the ties, look back to the chart and see which item you choose when ranking them against each other, and go with that one first. This chart is useful in weighing out numerous types of decisions.

It’s no good knowing your values if you don’t live your values. ~ Tim Brownson

Core Values In Practice

If you’ve discovered you value family over career, it may be time to look at your work schedule. Do you value health over indulgence, check in on your diet. If you value honesty or respect, consider it starts with you, act accordingly.

Identifying your values does not mean you’ll live in perfect accordance with them, but as a map, they will help guide you on your journey through life. You may occasionally miss a turn, take a detour, or run out of gas. That’s part of the adventure.

What’s your experience with core values? Have you determined yours in the past? Are you living up to them? Have they helped you make a major life decision? Let us know in the comments.